Men when they are aged over 40 have had a few relationships in their time. Some they wish to remember and some they wish to forget. They would have picked up a few emotional balls and chains possibly. It can sometimes be a challenge for a woman to understand the man she is dating and trying to form a relationship with.
Are you in a worse situation than everyone else? No man in his forties is going to want to listen to you if you are a continuous moaner, you moan about your ex your kids your job. No one wants to be around one of life’s victims. People want to hang out with positive people. It is a survival mechanism we all have. We take on people’s attitude and moods from people we are with.
Establish what qualities a man would be attracted to in you: Everyone has certain qualities in themselves, find your qualities, things you are good at. Do you do lot of things for others? Have you got a lot friends? What makes them want to hang out with you?
Setting your standards: Think about the type of man who would interest you. If you are very fussy why date someone who is slap dash? If you are interested in fitness why date someone who is a couch potato? It is obvious however if a man’s look or some other attribute outweighs other major failings in his character than a single lady who is lonely might overlook his failings if they irritate you after a short time than they will become major headaches later on in your relationship.
All men over the age of 40 love a lady: A lady is woman who you would be proud to have on your arm. She is not going to say some ridiculous thing in front of people you hang out with. She is going to be the type of woman you could take home to meet your mother. She tries to look her best. She does not drink in excess in public. She does not look cheap. A lady a man in would like to take out in his forties is feminine. She takes care of her hair her teeth she smells nice.
If you have problems in your relationship fix them: When you are in your forties it is sometimes easy to walk away however the journey of finding someone who is honest and trustworthy can be a lot more difficult. Instead of moaning about your relationship sit down and discuss it with your man. Dating does not just happen when you first meet. You should still be dating when you are married. Pay attention to your man and make sure he notices you. Make sure you are not Mrs Cellophane woman and your man looks straight through you make sure he knows you are there. If you are not happy with something in your relationship tell him. Make sure it does not just bubble away like a pressure cooker. Do not be a victim, too many people in this life are victims life remains the same not unless you change the pattern in life.
If you are not meeting the ideal man in your forties: Are you the ideal woman? Have you got lots of baggage? Does your family or friends influence your dating? You cannot get of the dating runway because you are carrying too much weight. Are you too fussy, are you looking for a younger man than your years? The younger man you are dating might just see you as a bit of excitement. Are you dating men in a higher demographic employment or social circle than yourself, you do not really fit in with his lifestyle because he is constantly working long hours. Your date finds you boring because you have not got anything interesting to say about yourself.
If the men who you have dated previously were of a higher educational standard than yourself possibly you would not be able to keep up with their conversation.
Does location come into your dating success? It is important to date someone who lives not too far away. At first life can seem like an adventure, a holiday when you go away a lot to spend time with your date. At some point you are going to have to move to where he lives or he is going to have to move in with you. One of you is going to have to sell one of your houses? What happens with the money? Is it party time? When the party is over the money is spent it is possible you could end up being by yourself. Does your man live with his Mum or in a bedsit; did I call him a man? No more said.
Get to know your date: Sometimes we might reject someone and not realise we have thrown away gold and later on picked up silver later on in our lives. Give you’re date a chance. Get to know him. He might not tell you the full story of his life when you first meet him. You might be making assumptions about him which are not true.
Does anyone know you are out there? Without taking action nothing will happen. You need to get out there and get noticed. Do not frequent some seedy bar. Sign up to a dating website, go out socializing with friend or family. Get out there and take the dog for a walk. Lots of men if they find you attractive will approach you because you have got a dog. It is something to break the ice.
Being in control of the situation: Do not drink too much on your date. The man who is taking you out might look a lot better than what he actually is after a few glasses of wine. Who wants to base a relationship upon drink? Keep an eye upon your drink. You do not want your drink laced with some date rape drug and not remember what happened on your date and end up with more than a bunch of flowers (you might end with flowers in hospital if you do not know what you done or what or why it happened). Make your own way to meet your date and make sure you plan to make sure you can get home under your own steam.
Take a mobile and have it switched on (do not keep checking your text messages): “How’s it going”, “What’s he like”? If you keep responding to these texts I can tell you what he is going to be like ANOYED, ANGRY, FRUSTRATED, IS IT MEN YOU ARE TALKING TO, IS THIS CHICK GOING TO PAY ME ANY ATTENTION? HER DINNER IS GETTING COLD, SHE IS SO FLIPPING RUDE.
Do not get in his car with central locking in cars you might not get out again. Leave plenty of time to get to your destination.
Have everything ready in advance. I know how women are deliberating on what dress to wear. Which shoes to wear? Which hand bag to take? Does my bum look big in this? I do not know he will never see. You have not got things prepared the night before.
Reading this article you might think I have had a terrible dating life. No lots of the above relates to things other men have said to me about women they have been out with and their experiences. Lots of scenarios relate to human nature, manners, courteously. Dating and life is like Karma. We reap the seeds we so. Be a nice person and others will be nice to you. If you run into someone who does not live their life by principles be strong enough to encounter them and tackle their selfish way of life and brush them to one side before they carry out any damage to you emotionally or physically. When we leave this mortal coil we have done our best.
Related dating articles for women dating a man over the age of forty
Dating in your forties and what to expect
Dating after 40 need not be frightening
Dating advice for women