Category Archives: Getting back into dating

Dating In A Throwaway Culture

Dating In A Throwaway Culture

Posted by Your Future Dating Community on Tuesday, 17 November 2015

Moving on after a relationship breakup

Have you tried going away together to try to repair your relationship or going out on date nights together?

After any breakup or situations which are painful the sooner you can accept it is over the quicker you will heal.

Do not think about things too obsessively.  If you have been together for some time there is a reason why your partner stayed with you.

Living with regret – If you could turn back the hands of time

You might of made the decision to split up with your man or woman, you might be thinking now you have made the wrong decisision there is nothing wrong with admitting your mistake however if you do this regularly you have serious problems.  You need to sort the problems out and repair the problems in your relationship.

Letting your heart heal without getting it broken too quickly again

Rushing into a new relationship if you have not sorted out your problems then you are destined to failure, you need to take a look at yourself and ask yourself:

Do you drink too much?

Do you spend too much?

Are you tight and do not like spending money?

Are you really boring?

Do you always want to stay in and do not want to go out?

Possibly you do not take care of yourself, perhaps you do need to get fit and get a new wardrobe?

If you are feeling depressed you might need to ask someone for help.  If you have been in a relationship for many years you might need a professional to help you with getting over your loss, you might need some sleeping tablets or anti-depressants.

Maintaining your dignity

Have dignity and do not beg for ex to come back.  It is important you do not phone them every five minutes or stalk them.

It is important not to seek revenge and look at what you can do give your ex as much grief as possible.

Relationships – How can I stop avoiding people?

Sometimes avoiding people can show lack of respect and lack of caring.  You might have someone who is like a leach hanging off you.  You should have courage and be honest with them and address the issues in your relationship with them.

If you have an anxiety order it could be the case you are not only avoiding people you are missing out on life, it is possible you have had some type of stressful occurrence in your life, have you been abused?  Have you had an abusive relationship?  Sometimes people suffer from anxiety due to a severe illness like cancer, they might have a body dismorphia, soldiers when they return from war can suffer from stress.  The best course of action is to seek medical help and possibly counselling, this could be in a group situation or on an individual one to one counselling therapy session.  Cognitive counselling.

Someone suffering from anxiety may want to avoid people completely, if this is the case, just going out for a walk can relieve stress, it can give a person the feeling of wellbeing and increase endorphins which will make the person want to go out more and boost their confidence.

If someone is permanently at home they might have lost their sense of purpose.  A lot of retired people can feel the loss of purpose, it is important to take up a hobby or do voluntary work to help less fortunate people than ourselves.

How to have fun and survive your blind date

Your friends tastes and yours might differ, you might actually be insulted with who they have chosen for you to take out on a date.  You might end up thinking your friends do not really know you.  It is best to remember your friends have your best intentions at heart, do not feel insulted or let down.  You never know their friend might become your friend eventually you might not fancy him or her however if you both have the same circle of friends you might hit it of mentally.

It best to have an open mind about your date and not have too a high expectations.  If you think about what your date is going to look like too much you might be a bit disappointed if she turn out to be a bit of a swamp donkey or he looks a bit of an old man when he Surviving_A_Blind_Dateturns up in his cardigan.

Do not insult your blind date by turning up late.  Remember your date has the same in trepidation about going on a date with you as well.  Do not shatter her or his dreams.  Do not insult them by turning up not dressed for the occasion.  Make sure you smell nice.  Do not turn up flustered make sure you leave plenty of time to get to your destination.  It is important to do something you both enjoy.  Make sure you both have the same interests.  Ask your friends what makes her or him tick.

It is important to have a get out exit plan.  If it is not going well why should you endure hours of boredom if you do not fancy your blind date, why should you listen to your blind dates boring conversation if you do not want to?  Be polite and make your exit.

Why not do something with your date which might not mean you are in each other’s company for too long if you want to escape it will not be too bad for you make an exit.

Why not meet up with your date for coffee or meet up with your blind date in a café for a snack.  Offer to split the bill then neither of you are obligated.  If you like to take things further you can extend the date, if not you can walk away.

You need to consider as well if he or she is already in a relationship, no one wants any baggage from a previous relationship.  Do your friends really no this individual, do they know his or her background.

Why not of bring a friend on your date, take a mobile phone to ensure your own safety, make sure people know where you are going.  Because your date has been arranged by friends acquaintances does not mean you should be put in a position of false security.  Do not fully trust your date until you fully know them.

It is important to be yourself, make sure you do not talk about your ex-partner on your blind date.  If you make out you are not something you are not, do not big yourself up or put yourself down.

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How to have success with online dating

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Women still like a man who will look after her, all women want a knight in shining amour, they want someone who will care for them a gentleman who is polite and courteous.  It is obvious really however so man men fail on the basics with simple things like opening doors etc.

Women dive in sometime and want to start talking about their biological clock and how important it is to start to settle down and have kids.  Singles sometimes make the enormous mistake of rabbiting on about their ex partners work or other problems in their life like Staying_In_Love_For_Yearstheir teenage kids.

We all give out an image and impression on how we are and what our home lives are like.  If you paint a poor picture no one is going to want to listen to you or spend time in your company.

There is millions of dating websites out there, it is this big wide world, this is multiplied by the amount of singles registered on these websites, there is plenty of fish in the pool of singles out there for someone to go out there and move onto the next dating profile and find who does sound like they will make them happy, who they can have fun with.

It is important if you are in the older age group you realize how rude some people can be and you just do not hear from them again after you have been out on a date with them.  You need to recognize and be aware of scammers.  It is only through reading dating advice articles online you learn the game of love and how like anything else love is a journey with rewards that only comes after time after trust and honesty has been built up and earned.

Related articles:

Online dating for singles

Dating advice for avoiding scammers

Are you too fussy when looking for a date?

Writing a good dating headline for your dating profile or e-mail 

Writing a good dating profile to attract other singles attention

Senior dating conversation starters – Making dating work for you

 

Feeling Lonely – Dating After The Affair

It is very difficult getting your life together after finding out your wife, husband or partner has had or is having an affair.

It is terrible situation to realize you cannot trust the person who is closest to you in the world who you may of spent decades with.

The feeling of rejection is terrible, music has no meaning.   Some music will set you off as well.  You feel as though your heart has been ripped out.  You are screaming on the inside.  If you have friends or relatives who have been married for years they do not understand what you are going through.

If you have children with your partner they have not only done the dirty on you they have also done the same to your children and the effect of the betrayal will affect them especially if they teenagers.  You may choose to date an older or younger partner and your children may try to follow your example.

Recovering from the devastating news you have been rejected and replaced by someone else is all about acceptance.  It is a good idea not to say anything bad about your partner.  He or she might have a change of heart and want to come back.

It is a fatal mistake to say anything negative about your partner to your children.  This could end up really back firing in the long run.

Do not start dating straight away.  Give yourself time to recover mentally.  You could end up being with someone who you normally cross the road to avoid.

When you are ready to go out dating again the most important thing to wear on your date is a smile.

If you are attempting online dating take a good dating profile picture in good light.  One of the most important things in the picture is the background.

Tell people where you are going on a date.  Meet them in a public place.  Make your own way home.

Ask for advice from one of your friends about what you are thinking of wearing on your date and if it is suitable.

You never know your partner might have left you because you look a mess and they never had the heart to tell you.

If your partner has left you and really slatted you verbally their home truths might be true.  See if you can learn from their criticisms.  Some of them might not be totally true though.

Some people put others down to bring themselves up and so do not take it all to heart.

Dating who knows what tomorrow brings

Mending_A_Broken_HeartWho knows what tomorrow brings!  Without taking action by registering on any dating website for free nothing will happen.  Where are all the singles?  Well you have got to go out there and find them and one of the best places is on a dating website, there is nothing to be ashamed of.

Sit down and ask yourself are you ready, is there anything you can change to make yourself more datable?  Take a look at your previous relationships.

Be fun to be with, make interesting conversation.

Take the first step to finding a new you and a new relationship.

Dating for the lonely hearted

It is not ideal going to bars for anyone who is single, most times you come away feeling sad and lonely (drink is a depressant). If you are aged around 40 you might not fit in because you might be older than some people out but still young enough and attractive enough to have a good time.

Lots of singles who frequent bars are just out to have fun and not looking for any long term commitment and at the end of the day why shouldn’t they.

Some of your friends may try to match you up with their friends or work or single acquaintances. They might have good intentions however these types of situations rarely work. I should know someone tried to match me up and the poor lady was not my type. If no one else wanted her why sould I want her. It just never would of worked. I was young then it would have been like something from a version of the 1970’s Inbetweeners.

Night clubs are not the like they were years ago, there is no longer slow dances at the end of the night. It can be very funny at the end of the night when you see the lights come on and every one scatters. The lights can be very unforgiving. I am no oil painting either.

Online dating is better (You are sober). You can take your time. Find other singles who live near you. If you think someone is not all that they seem to be you can chat to them on Skype or in one of the chat rooms and see if you have been chatting to the person who your e-mailing the person who you thought you were chatting to online via e-mail. Nothing is worse to think you have been flirting with someone via e-mail who is the complete opposite they say. Imagine you could have been doing this all in your PJ’s in your living room at any time of night or day. If you keep all of your personal details to yourself you should be perfectly safe.

Online dating matches you up with someone else who has similar interests and values to yourself. How long and difficult this be finding out this information in a bar or nightclub?

Headlines for Dating Websites

What should you go for a dating headline profile or emails?

It can be just as difficult to think of a punchy headline as it is to write a good dating website profile. Attracting a great date starts with writing an equally catchy headline.  Your dating headline profile or email subject headline is what will set you among the rest.

Remember you only have seconds to capture someone’s interest when singles browse through hundreds of dating profiles after a day at the office they do now want to do so at great depth.  They want to communicate with someone who is exciting and vibrant and capture their interest within seconds.

Your dating profile headline should be brief but snappy.

Your profile should have your interests.  What makes you tick?  It is important to portray a positive image.

What attracts others to your dating profile? Things to try.

Should you choose a funny headline (Who has attractive wives? Comedians?).  Why not experiments by changing you profile on a regular basis?

See what results you get over a period of time, this is a ploy marketing expert’s use when sending out mass emails to prospective clients.

A dating profile is a bit like selling you have to set yourself out amongst the rest.  The idea of having a great catchy dating headline is to capture the reader’s interest and make them click on your profile.

Proof read and spell check what you have written and only after you have read it a couple of times upload to the internet dating website.  By not checking things it seems as though you could be bothered with doing things properly and this reflects on you.

The more interesting you’re dating profile the more curious the reader becomes and eventually you will capture someone’s interest.

Some positive interesting things to say about yourself:

You have got to say something interesting.  Look at how companies sell thing for example.
Say something positive about yourself.  You want a potential suitor to read more bait them get them interested.

Your aim is to create a dating profile that generates a high level of interest.

Say something creative.  Why on Facebook some people have lots of people hanging off every word, look at their technique.

Newspapers write headlines that sell, you have got to have and do the same.  You have got to put your hook out there to get your catch.

You have got to ask yourself how much loneliness is costing your lonely heart.
Do you want to wave goodbye to loneliness?

Work out what makes people laugh.  Sometimes people like the sound of their own voice however no one is listening.

Life is all about choice, make sure you choose me.

Lost Smile.  Reward for recovery of a broken lonely heart.

Ask a few open questions requiring an answer

Why not give us some examples of some good dating profile headlines that got some results, laughs?

Getting in the frame of mind for writing your dating profile:

The mood you are in reflects in the way you convey yourself, if you are stressed you will not want to put much into writing your dating profile.

Take time.  Write your dating profile in stages, go back and review what you have written.

Ask a friend to review what you have written, is it captivating.  Is it powerful enough to capture the reader’s interests and make them think about what you have said?

It is important to reflect you are a kind thoughtful person.  Lots of people on dating websites have had their hearts broken.  They might of lost confidence.  Lost someone dear to them.

The picture you take and the impression you give:

You’re dating profile picture or pictures reflect the person you are.  If you are holding a bottle people will ask if you are an alcoholic.

Do not show too much flesh, you might give off the impression you are a vamp or tarty.

Upload more than one photograph of yourself.

Writing a good dating website profile

HELP! What should I write in my dating website profile?:

So you’ve decided to try online personals. Well you’ve come to the right place. Here are tips for writing attention getting profiles.

Most online dating services ask standard questions about yourself. It’s great to get the particulars of yourself out of the way, but the key to a good personal ad is what you write in the description & headline fields. Think of your personal ad as an advertisement for yourself. The goal is to draw people in with your headline and keep the reader’s attention by writing an interesting description of yourself.

Your Dating Profile Headline:

The headline for your profile needs to be catchy enough to get someone’s attention in just a few words. You can easily do this by using keywords that best sum up your personality. If you’re funny it should show in your headline. There’s no need to include details about yourself such as your age since that information is listed along with your headline. It’s also important not to say anything that makes you sound desperate like in these examples:

  • Lonely Guy/Girl
  • Sick of being single
  • Desperate for love
  • Tired of Looking

Remember, you’re essentially trying to sell yourself and your positive qualities. So avoid negative statements in your headline and have fun with it! It’s also a good idea to include phrases like “click here” or ask a question like “Are you a movie fanatic?” When you ask someone to do something or to answer a question you’re more likely to get results.

Your Dating Profile Description:

Now let’s talk about the Description for your ad. This is your chance to say in your own words what you’re about. It’s not enough to answer a bunch of generic questions. So GO FOR IT. Let your personality show and don’t hold back. Keep in mind there are hundreds of profiles just like yours that say the same things. So say something to stand out from the crowd and make the reader curious to find out more about you. Talk about things that are interesting to you and stay away from clichйs. And please, please avoid making up things about yourself. You’re only wasting your time and someone else’s by being dishonest. I suggest writing enough to convey what you’re about but not revealing everything about yourself initially. A good rule of thumb is to keep your description within 200-300 words.

Good luck!!